In Memory of Carolyn Shinners #20

This is posted by Jodi Moore (captain) of the Blades in memory of a teammate who passed away in 2009.

Today was a very emotional day for all of the Provo Blades. A lot of us had the opportunity to attend the funeral services of our friend and teammate Carolyn Shinners. It was a beautiful memorial to her life and she had a lot of family and friends there, including members of both her hockey teams sporting their jerseys.

When the casket was brought in tears started to flow. Watching her family come in was really hard. She LOVED her family, especially her brothers. And to know they have to go on without her is really hard. The opening hymn was “Be Still My Soul” #124. Go read the words and then you will realize why I was sobbing through the entire song. It’s amazing how touching music can be.

Carolyn’s brother, Joe read her obituary and shared a few personal stories about her. Joe had the opportunity to practice with the Blades for a season and I got to speak to him in the line at the viewing on Sunday. He said that playing with us that year got him started in hockey and made him a big part of who he is today. He was so glad that Carolyn was a part of our team. He shared a story about how she stuck up for him when they played on Springville High together and punched a guy in the face who had hit Joe earlier in the game. That is the girl we know and love.

Carolyn’s sister-in-law and her older brother, Mike also spoke in the service. The overall theme that everyone spoke about was hoping that people would carry on and live the kind of life that Carolyn would want us to live. Work hard, be loyal, be kind, and of course (my own interpretation) keep playing hockey!

The closing song was “Where Can I Turn for Peace” #129. Once again, I couldn’t contain my tears during the song. The words have so much meaning in this situation. I am not sure I will ever be able to hear these two hymns again without remember our Carolyn. Suzy had the honor of saying the closing prayer which was emotional as well. She did a great job and really held up well. She was like Carolyn’s surrogate Mom on the team and they had a special bond. It was fitting that she was the one to close out the service.

Hockey was a huge part of Carolyn’s identity and we were all a big part of that. Her mom was so touched by the support that we all showed her during this difficult time. She said that when Carolyn joined our team she was struggling with figuring out who she was and what her purpose was in life. Hockey helped her find that and find something to be proud of herself about. She blossomed as a member of the Provo Blades and turned into our feisty defender and biggest advocate. If anyone said anything negative about the team or anyone on the team Carolyn would take it to them.

Julie put together an amazing scrapbook of the pictures that you all sent to me. All of the people that attended were able to sign the book as a tribute to Carolyn and what she meant to our team. We presented it to her mom after the funeral and she was so grateful. She urged us all to play hard and to always remember Carolyn when we play. She really wants to see our program continue to flourish and grow because she will always remember that impact it had in her daughter’s life.

We will be retiring Carolyn’s jersey #20 out of respect for her and because it would be too hard to see anyone wear that jersey in the future. I told her Grandpa (Poppy) that we would be having some kind of ceremony to do this and he got all teary-eyed and said that would be like a second funeral for him. His biggest joy and what he shared most with Carolyn was the love of hockey.

I am so emotionally drained after the events of yesterday and today. I wanted to share my thoughts for anyone who wasn’t able to make it.  I am still in shock and I’m not sure everything will sink in fully until we hit the ice this year and realize that she will never skate with us again. I am going to do everything I can to make this our best, most fun season ever and hope that somewhere out there Carolyn will be smiling down on us glad that we are continuing to play the sport that we all love.

Please leave your thoughts/comments about the service or Carolyn below.